Failing to Fail

I just got my final marks for the term back and, pending my poli-sci mark, I didn't fail anything! Not straight A's, but that just gives me a goal for next semester, eh? I don't really care, but it is nice to know that I am not going to have to drop out and start looking for a job... not right away, anyhow. I think this semester will be most wonderful for everyone, particularly given the switching into anthropology by several of the Edmonton crew, who will likely be much happier there.

So 2004 ends on a positive note. I guess in a lot of ways it's been a decent year, and when it was awful, it at least taught us that we're stronger than we thought. And tonight I'm going out to a party to celebrate having survived another year and having done so with sanity nearly intact. Happy New Year, all!

Feliz Noel

It is retardedly late, and yet here I am a-typing. I got to feeling somewhat guilty about being (as Bev says) a "Holiday Lollyblogger". My apologies, Beverina. My excuse is that I have been... busy. Yes, that's the one. Anyway, a brief and boring recap of the past few days goes as follows: 22nd I wrote my last, horrible exam. 23rd I flew home and hung around the house, then decorated the tree with the Fambly, who are all as delightful as ever. 24th I hung out at home again, and Katie F. came over for the Exchanging of the Presents (she got me a very delightful and useful set of wicker bin thingies and a nifty yoga book -- yay!). We went to Christmas Eve mass at Saint Jo's, and so I missed seeing Katie J. at the OLPH mass I had told her I was attending. Oops. But it was a lovely mass, despite the lack of Katie. 25th was, of course, Christmas day, and we opened our gifts and went to the Lockaus' for Christmas dinner, which was large and sumptuous, and met her aunt Lena, who seems very nice. Today I went to a movie with Jeanne and her new Boy, Rob. Jeanne: I approve. Since I have been reading too much Jane Austen, I deem Rob "a well-mannered young man, with good spirits and a pleasant countenance". Besides that, he was not too freaked out by our weirdness (and has excellent taste in girls. Hee.). After arriving home from the movie, I went to Laura's for dinner and more movies. I have seen five movies in the past 36 hours: Eurotrip, Lemony Snicket, Napoleon Dynamite, Fight Club, and Clockwork Orange. I say respectively: "Hee!" "Good show!" "HAHAHA!" "Whoa... cool" and "Kubrick and Burgess, I bow before thee. How's about a bit of the old... ultra-violence?" And now, against Laura's vehement concerns for my security (her concern does her credit, but I wanted to sleep at home anyway) I am back home and looking forward to a good sleep and another wonderful day. On the agenda: Lunch with Kim and either Mrs. Dear or Mrs. Penner (help! I don't remember which!) and a visit with Tawnie. The infinite promise of such a day is only matched by the joy of not doing any work.

ADD

I want to go hooome. I don't waaaant to write another exaaaam.

Daddeeeee, I wanna poneee.

Please disregard my inner child. She is petulant today, and is preventing the last-minute studying I so desperately need. Exam in T -3 hours.

WestJet

WestJet is the most fabulous airline ever. They don't feed you, but that way you're not guessing about it (Air Canada, I am looking at you). The staff are not only efficient, but so nice. I just called to confirm my flight and the lady was very polite and advised me that "if you want to bring, say, a large pepperoni pizza on board, you should bring a slice for the flight attendant because then she'll act as a bodyguard against the other passengers and you can eat your pizza in peace." Point taken, madame.

I'm going home!!!

Yay!

Katherine and Robyn are back! Yaaay! And I just went swimming with Natalie! Yaaay! I love Christmas.

I Had A Dream, Pt. 2

Drifting off to sleep last night, I had one of those dream snippets that can be so disturbing. I don't know if it's the stress of exams or what, but something made me dream three seconds of an evangelical Christian baking show. It went as follows:

Christmassy backdrop of dark green, a kitchen counter in front of it. Cut to:

Nice Christian baking lady: And remember, there's got to be Christ in the buns!

Me [waking up]: Whaaa?

Suspicious Cafeteria Items

"Pork Pies With Pork"

Reasons my roomie is acceptably awesome

1. She sleeps a lot.

2. When she sleeps, she sleeps deeply.

3. She creates an acceptable level of mess.

4. Three words: Mongolian house music. Insanity! It's cool.

5. She is neither pushy nor controlling. Hooray!

6. We can explain stuff to each other because we are in the same program.

7. Indra likes the Monty Python sketches she has seen. There is hope.

Economics, Schmeconomics

Ah, whatcha gonna do. Exams are in full swing. I've written two (French and public affairs) and have three to go. Economics is tomorrow; I am terrified. Trala.

Had cross-country practice today, our first one with the wrist-mounted odometer/speedometer that Jacob bought this week. It was exciting to discover that the little "6km" loop we have been running along the canal up to Pretoria Bridge and back is actually almost 11km. So, the 10km run we supposedly did was actually more like 15. This explains much.

Ice, Ice, Baby

A few days ago we had freezing rain. This is turning out brilliantly. The roads and sidewalks have been cleared and everywhere else is a skating rink. So today I went with Laura, Katherine, and Robyn, and we amused ourselves by going across the canal to the Arboretum and sliding down the hill. Katherine and I succeeded in getting back up the hill, and made a human chain to pull up Laura, whose shoes were slippery and who was having a little trouble. It was like the evolution of man... just Laura and Robyn struggling up the hill, all hunched-over.

And then it was back to the Fishbowl for another round of brick hockey. After that, to Glengarry to watch Carolyn Parrish take on Tucker Carlson, who continues to be a disgrace to the name of "human being". And then, to continue the audiovisual movable feast, it was my room for some Monty Python sketches. "My hovercraft is full of eels!" indeed. And now here I am, sitting quietly in my room again. What a delightful day.

Somehow, I got an A on the PAPM mini-essay that I made up the night before it was due. Hmm. This is not a good precedent to set, methinks. It was funny picking it up, though: my TA has mysteriously acquired a fan club. There were about ten girls sitting in a cluster around Denis and furiously taking notes. Apparently his other tutorial group (Katherine's) made him a card, which he says is on his fridge.

Tea? New Worlds?

Jacob is mocking me on MSN. Witness:

Jessica's subconscious says: "It is taking me over. I am now dependent on it! mmmm [Daily Show], you are like relieving morphine, sweet at the time, and addictive later...would anyone like some tea?"

I just really, really like The Daily Show. Is that such a crime?

Today I had my paradigm deconstructed in public affairs class. As I said during the break, "Hmm. I do believe my brain has ruptured and will shortly start leaking from my nose. Can I have a tis-sue?" It is difficult when you go into the contemporary stuff, which basically highlights how unsolvably messed-up the world is, and then you are told that nihilism is kind of pointless as well. At least my French oral exam went alright as well, I think, though it was a ridiculous amount of work for five per cent of the year's mark.

Jessica needs no sleep. Jessica needs only coffee and pretzels, and Jon Stewart and Thomas Hobbes and her essay.

Crunch Time 2: Electric Boogaloo

Well, it is exam time once again. You can tell by the blood on the walls and the panic in our eyes. The worst things about exam time are, in order:

1. Public affairs twelve-page essay of MADNESS.

2. The stupid French movie we have to watch to prepare for our oral exam. Only three people can watch it at a time in the language lab thing. There is one copy on campus. There are forty-four people in my French class. You do the math.

3. Positive reinforcement from previous good marks is making me feel that I have to study hardcore and do just as well as I did on my midterms. I don't actually want to do this.

That's about it. Last night was fun -- a bunch of the Girls From the Floor went out to see the Parliament lights and then out for dessert at Oh So Good. Brandy pumpkin cheesecake is yummy, in case y'all are wondering. There are photos below. The Daily Show was, as usual, brilliant, covering Bush's visit to Canada.

And I'm up reasonably early this morning because my group tried to watch the stupid movie (see number 2 in the List of Bad). I understand that the movie is certifiably francophone in that it is totally insane. Apparently it is a documentary, and the narrator goes nuts and starts screaming at a skull or some such... this is just what I've heard, mind you.

A group of urchins keeps warm in the Chateau Laurier. From left: Shweta, Maria, Bev, me, Amanda, Nicole, Kaija, and (crouching) Amanda and Allison.

Having delicious dessert at Oh So Good

Friendship can turn ugly in the blink of an eye, particularly when one of the friends has aikido mojo.

Alphabeticizing

My all-time favourite thing said in poli-sci this semester:

"You can come down to the front and collect your essays. Now, I've put them all in order, so please do not disrupt the alphabeticity."

Good Vibrations

I'm actually feeling pretty good today. I thought I was coming down with another cold (bleah!) earlier, but it seems to be better now. Mallory and I went swimming, my French class was non-crazy-making for once, and things seem to be going swimmingly. See what just ignoring your work can do for you? I'm getting a bit behind, I think, but it's not too bad yet. I mostly have a backlog of notes to type up.

The Glen Gang is here to watch The Daily Show, as is the ritual of Monday to Thursday nights. They are quite the amusing bunch. It strikes me that I seem to be making the same kind of friends here as I have at home: mostly a bit preppy, mostly female, mostly kvetchingly ironic.(Kvetchingly may not be a word, but it oughta!)

Christmas preparations are in full swing. Indra and I have lights for our room now, and looking out across the Fishbowl I can see that a lot of other rooms have them, too. Katherine has flashing icicle lights for her room -- amusing to look at, but if she and Robyn suddenly have seizures, we will know why. Some folks have gone all-out and bought actual Christmas trees for their rooms. I don't know how they manage to live in among the branches (our rooms are not that big, and some of these trees are considerable), but I salute their superior levels of holiday cheer.

The cross-country club starts practice Monday. Whee!

All in all, you're just another brick in...

The Wall, which was released 25 years ago tomorrow. And how well it's aging! It's got "Hey You" and "Comfortably Numb", two of Pink Floyd's best songs (in my humble opinion). So congratulations, The Wall!

Signs

Sometimes the universe seems to be trying to tell you something. Just now, I think it is trying to tell me that I should never, ever go to parties. It does this by having me come into contact with puke every time I attempt to do a Wild And Crazy University Party thing. Honestly -- and it's getting worse each time. First with the accidental touching of it, then stepping in it and recoiling quickly, and then last night.

I am never, ever going to a shot party again. Because I never actually feel like getting off-my-brain drunk (four drinks is not blasted, but neither does it do anything more exciting than make me feel warm, dizzy, and slightly deaf). And then I am bored and surrounded by drunk people. The universe has said, "Jessica should go to movies with her sober friends, or bowling with her tipsy friends, but she should not hang around in basements with budding alcoholics bent on a bender." Jessica says, "OK, universe. Frankly, there's only so much time one can devote to laundry anyway, why make it worse by having to wash other people's bodily excretions out of one's clothing?"

Somewhere, generations of party-hearty undergrads are spinning in their graves. And you know what? If they're going to get their boxers in a twist about my renunciation of shot parties, keggers, etc, then they can do my laundry.

Um... Awesome?

You're The Guns of August!
by Barbara Tuchman
Though you're interested in war, what you really want to know is what causes war. You're out to expose imperialism, militarism, and nationalism for what they really are. Nevertheless, you're always living in the past and have a hard time dealing with what's going on today. You're also far more focused on Europe than anywhere else in the world. A fitting motto for you might be "Guns do kill, but so can diplomats."
Take the Book Quiz at the Blue Pyramid.

I guess that makes sense, what with my love of WWI-era history lately. And, you know, the hatred of nationalist fervour.

Hello, Muddah

Well, I have had an excellent weekend and another mediocre Monday. Mum and I painted Ottawa a very becoming shade of crimson. Ruth came up Wednesday night and we went out to Azteca, this really excellent Mexican restaurant, where we discussed all men (except my dad) in scathing terms and did some post-election gnashing of teeth on delicious coriander chickpea soup, shrimp alambre, and/or chile relleno. The waiter looked rather Italian, I suspect he got lost on his way to his job in the Corsa Italia and just stayed.

We stayed at Webb's, for old time's sake, and had a slumber party of sorts. Indra got the room to herself for a weekend, though she went to stay with her friend Maral for a couple of days, too. Indra's quite fun to hang around, actually. I kind of missed her. Anyway, Thursday we had breakfast at Al's Diner (all our old haunts...) and Mum took Ruth on a tour of Ottawa. I was with them in spirit, but physically was in economics class. Alas. We met for lunch in the cafeteria, and Jacob came with. Mum found out that Jacob went to McEarnen (sp?) when he was living in Edmonton and proceeded to grill him about the teachers he had. That's okay; Jacob doesn't mind answering questions. Ruth left Thursday afternoon, since her horrid director apparently doesn't consider Friday nights part of the weekend and scheduled her to work. This meant that I got Mum to myself for two days.

During those two days, we shopped almost continuously. Nothing like retail therapy. And we also walked in the Arboretum and saw Garden State, which she seems to have loved, which I gather from our long conversation about its fabulousness. She got to meet Katherine, Robin, Jacob, Bharkha, Sara, and a few other people briefly. Now she has some faces to put with names. I am very, very glad she came; I was a little concerned that I'd have become such a lone wolf in my, you know, three months' absence from home that I would chafe at having any kind of maternal controls on me. But it really wasn't a thing, because we were just bopping around town free of time constraints.

It is fast becoming pedal-to-the-metal knuckle-down time because finals are approaching and I have just spent the weekend on previously described delightful mini-vacation. Will my trials never end?

Short answer: No.

The Blues

Today I am angry. I am angry mostly because of washer no. 13 in the laundry room, which apparently is boycotting the spin cycle and has thereby forced me to get in touch with my inner mediaeval wench, wringing out my clothes by hand and muttering various horrible words as I kicked the offending appliance lustily. Death upon ye, washer no. 13. Marry and amen. Also, I suck at French.

On the upside, I have successfully liberated two bagels from the cafeteria and (most importantly) The Daily Show is on tonight so I can distract myself from my anger with the comedy stylings of that gang. I'm guessing there's going to be a Mess O'Potamia segment dealing with the offensive on Fallujah. According to the New York Times, much of Fallujah has been reduced to "smoking ruins". Colin Powell has also resigned, so I'd say there's a good half-hour in those two things alone. Good comedy material, if not good news.

Tick tick tick

It is officially freaking me out how much time seems to have accelerated in the past few months. It's Sunday night. What did I do this weekend? Good question. I haven't left campus since I went out to the movies a few weeks ago. I don't seem to have the time to put important documents or personal correspondence in the mail. All I've really been able to do is get a bit caught up in my notes. That said, I am never, ever behind in history. There is always time for history, usually time for public affairs and poli sci, sometimes time for French, and occasionally time for economics. Which leaves... not much time for laundry, that's for sure. I just did laundry about ten minutes ago, but that was last Sunday night. And now I'm almost out of bras again. Where is the justice in that?

I Had a Dream

I was going to watch The Daily Show but some Star Trek movie was on instead, so I decided to go for a walk. So I'm walking along, beside a waterway of some kind, and I find a person looking after a fish. The fish, as I see, is about two millimetres long. And the person says to me, "you may laugh now, but that fish is the next president of the United States." And, because it's a dream, I didn't find it particularly strange. So I took the fish out of the water and started walking with it (so it could go visit my Uncle Jim -- apparently it was his fish) but the board it was on did not retain water as well as I had hoped, and the fish suddenly dried up and blew away. So I killed the first non-human president of the United States last night. Oops?

Sigh

Essaaaaaayyyyyyyyyy.(Jessica's brain has melted. Please peel her off the floor.)

The Gawden State

I am having a decent weekend, having broken out of my "Wraaa! Jessica Smash!" cycle. I was having one good/decent day followed by one dreadful day, consistently from Monday til Thursday. Maybe someone has my voodoo doll in a centrifuge or something. Friday was good, though, so the vicious continuum was broken. Whee.

If you have talked to me, you know, at all in the past couple of days you will know that one of the reasons my weekend has been so good is that I went out to the movies with Katherine (also got some excellent bagels -- Mum, I have found a good bagel place in Canada!) and saw two fabulous movies very cheaply and now I can't shut up about them. I simply loved Garden State. Napoleon Dynamite was dynamite as well, but Garden State had a certain je ne sais quoi. (I am on a mission to use as many italics in this post as possible, okay?) Anyway, if you get the chance to catch one or both of them, do it! End of infomercial.

Mum is coming in nine days! The excitement builds. I am already planning stuff to do: there is the aforementioned bagel place, a walk by the river or the canal, perhaps a visit to Parliament... It should be fun. I do not plan on getting any work done and neither should she.

Other than that, life continues. The history midterms haven't been handed back yet, which is giving everyone a case of the vapours. My Big Bad Essay is shaping up nicely, I think, though there is more work left to do than I would like. Naturally.

I rule all. Thank you.

This just in: I rock. The behind of my poli-sci midterm was kicked, and kicked well. Wow wow!

Tonight I shall be baying at the moon, writing my essay, and running. Despite the fact that it is raining; rather it will be an opportunity to use my lovely new raincoat.

Wraaa! Jessica smash!

Those not prepared for gnashing of teeth and rending of garments should not come anywhere near my dorm room; I have been upset all day and have in fact given myself a stomachache through angry eating (it is possible to eat angrily, believe me) and a sore throat through yelling.

Yes, we went into a field and yelled, Natalie and I. It was awesome. It was, basically, the worst day of my life. Two months exactly since the accident, and the American people have chosen to relive the nightmare of the past four years. The ones who have made such horrifying decisions have been rewarded and the frightened people are clinging to them like children to apron strings, praying that their dear leader will protect them, when he has nobody's best interests at heart but those of the incredibly wealthy. It's like they want to be spanked -- the security measures undertaken by this administration do nothing for Americans or the other 96% of the world's population. They only remove the rights that made the United States the leader and light of the world, to be replaced by what? Nothing. I honestly believe that the States can be the greatest country in the world, and can accomplish brilliant things both for itself and for the planet. I am not un-American because I disagree with those in charge at the White House, the Pentagon, the House, and the Senate. I am un-American if I refuse to make my opinions known.

And now, in true Canadian fashion, I apologize for sounding angry, but I am. I am angry that people could let themselves be fooled again by the fear, and the hatred. Greed is fine. It's natural to be greedy. If tax cuts are what you want, then vote Libertarian.

However, if you want to get an irresponsible, unchristian regime out, if you want to have responsible financial policy (e.g. not spending hugely and cutting taxes irresponsibly) coupled with non-incendiary foreign policy, free and just social policy, if you want no arsenic in your water, and a moderate, logical government rather than one that runs on ideology, then please... think hard about your vote's consequences on your fellow citizens, some of whom are on welfare, in the army, being unfairly detained, going to public school, on Medicare, or participating in any of a thousand things that the government does. Heck, think hard about what your vote means to the rest of the human race. It's important. It was important this time but now it's over. Thanks, America, for listening to reason.

Hot venison on a cracker, there are a lot of commas in this.

Nobody much is going to read this; it's not like I have a pulpit or anything here, more of a padded cell, but I needed to say it anyway. Goodnight.

The Big Night

Tonight's the night! The big election! I'm very, very excited. It is pretty much useless attempting any concealment of the fact that Bush is not my favourite president ever, so I'm going to say, right off the bat, that I think Kerry is the by far the better choice. And it's such a weird, weird election. Everyone (pundits, Mum, columnists) are saying they've never seen one quite like it in terms of divisiveness and uncertainty. Hate to say it, but I'm pretty sure somebody's going to get killed this time if there's any uncertainty whatsoever about results.

And then there's the sheer nastiness of the campaign. Both major parties have been seeking not just to influence how the voters vote, but who gets to vote. I've never seen anything like it: the country wanting to bring the light of democracy to the world is also turning its own citizens away from the polls. Frankly, I'd rather have somebody vote twice than not vote at all. It's not great to have to choose, but it's true. Anyway. There's vitriol all over the place and I am just glad to be far from Ohio tonight, because stuff is supposed to get pretty ugly there.

In other news, I am not cranky today. A good run can cure all ills, even if one's hip feels all hurty and needs to pop. Today has been much better. Econ was tedious, as usual, but I survived, I did well on my assignment, my poli-sci essay looms (as usual) but it's coming together a bit and I have lots of material. I've also had some good socializing, just by running into people in the hallway or cafeteria. Finally gave Jeff that note from Jordan (she gave it to me at Thanksgiving), and had a good talk with him. He's feeling a bit loopy because of two weeks' confinement to the architecture building.

Also, my mommy's coming to visit me. It's just like preschool; I hardly think I've been this excited to see her since then. Yay! And she's going to hang out with me and we'll do all kinds of boring together stuff which I miss.

I hope she likes my friends and boyfriend and all. And if she doesn't? I don't know. She usually does.

Captain Crank

I have just had a bad day (for no apparent reason) and I am cranky. Again. Bah. I suppose I deserve it after devoting a weekend to revelry (going to Katherine's birthday, to Kate J's party, to the Rocky Horror Picture Show...). But this seems excessive.

Despite my crankiness, I acknowledge that apple cinnamon instant oatmeal rocks. It is better than cookies, people, and easier to eat if you didn't have any teeth!

Hallowe'en!

Hi folks! It occurs to me that I haven't updated in several days and, as I am presently avoiding work (that should really be the title of this blog: Presently Avoiding Work), I thought I'd throw a little post on here.

Hallowe'en is awesome so far. It's been a very social weekend, probably something to do with the lunar eclipse. I've been feeling sort of bipolar -- always either up or down, no real medium. Right now it's raining (again) so I'm closer to the down side, but liff goes on. It certainly has been doing so this weekend. Friday night I went out for Katherine's birthday (every Katherine in Ottawa seems to have red hair) with a bunch of her friends. They're awesome people, and we have all these friendly Toronto vs. Alberta and Journalism vs. Public Affairs faux-threatening matches, complete with faux-ghetto cries of "word to your mother!". It's rather amusing, though it may not make sense to, you know, sane people. We went to this very strange Italian restaurant, which is decorated like some kind of Renaissance Faire, complete with murals of wenches and drunken monks. The food was good, and someone (me) cleverly thought to bring balloons and birthday candles for our amusement, so Katherine somehow wound up tied to about six balloons and was forced to take the bus like that. Thank God it was Hallowe'en weekend; we would have gotten even more strange looks had it not been.

Saturday night I went out with Bev From The Floor (FTF -- hereafter anyone From the Floor will be referred to as such)and Jacob to a house party at Kate J's. Kate's mother and my mother work together, and we're in the same program but she's in second year and has her own house now. She's very nice, and the party was perhaps boozy but nothing terribly illegal went down (and if they didn't want minors to drink, they wouldn't have such a high drinking age, would they?). It was full of second-years and loud music, and there was dancing and carousing until the wee hours, etc. etc. We crashed there and walked back this morning.

I really have to go do work now. Alas! and farewell.

El Presidente

Today was quite awesome on a number of levels. I got some actual work done on my poli-sci essay, bringing my total number of pages of factoids and ramblings to six! Oh, glory! I was able to amuse myself in economics by means of Cheerios drawings, a demonstration of the clear advantage of Cheerios over lesser cereals (I am looking at you, Corn Flakes!). And, oh yeah, incidentally, I got to see the President of Mexico speak. A few days ago I got an e-mail saying I was on the waiting list for the event, and I was one of the last people they let in today. I'm just glad I only overslept half an hour, instead of forty minutes! Anyway, it was very cool. He radiates optimism and charisma and has a fabulous mustache which looks as though it wants to burst its well-groomed confines and run, unfettered, through the wilderness. President Fox is all over the free-trade issue, and is an incredibly enthusiastic cheerleader for it. He steered clear of thornier issues less flattering to free trade, such as my mother's question: "Whither the Mexican middle class?" I do not know. But I do know that Mexico is starting a pretty big new health insurance program, and that now it only takes two days to register a business in Mexico, instead of several months (I guess if you cut off everyone's coffee breaks and siestas, then you're halfway there...).

As the Mexican delegation left, I was one of the kids pulled aside for a possible photo op. I proved insufficiently pushy to get close to Fox (hey, it's not like I had any trenchant questions) and in any case, any pushiness I could muster was more than outmatched by that of a klatch of moustachioed Latin media and diplomatic types. One outstanding man, dressed in Crazed Hiker style with Gore-tex pants and wearing a straw fedora with feathers in the hatband, was pushier than I and was heard to yell from the edge of the scrum, "President Fox, do you use solar power in your wonderful country?" He caught my attention, for some reason. Perhaps it was the knee-high socks.

Went rock climbing again Monday night, and it was quite awesome. I managed to get up a rather difficult stretch, the one on that 5.10 wall that threw me so badly last time. Once that was over, though, I didn't have the strength to get up the rest of the wall, so the difficult bottom two-thirds about did me in. How vexing. Oh well, next time perhaps. I was able to do a 5.8 route, though. Routes are exercises in willpower, because there are all these perfectly serviceable holds on the wall, but you can only use the ones with a particular colour of tape on them, regardless of whatever beautiful hold is temptingly in range. In this case, it was red, so I had to recoil from the green tape. It was quite the good time. I am also learning to tie my own knot, and hopefully to do it properly.

West Wing tomorrow! Hooray! And I am also going out to Old Navy with some of Les Girls to find a white dress shirt. Good luck, me. It is, once again, far too late o'clock. Goodnight, moon!

Yum, Yum

This French project ate my weekend. It is eighteen pages long and one of the girls in the group didn't get her stuff to me so I could check it over and integrate it with the rest of our stuff until after midnight. Jessica is tired and she is cranky and her essay still hasn't gotten anywhere because this damn French class is taking up all her time on tedious busywork.

It is Monday morning, and Jessica is displeased.

Capital, Capital

Once again it is far too late. Funny how "far too late" comes around once a day. But hey, Mallory and I had to watch Lord of the Rings: the Return of the King, okay?

It was necessary. Not to mention awesome. Those are seriously excellent movies -- even the violence is cool, and we know that the Jessica is not all about the violence in film. But it's different when you have a tiny man slaughtering away with a giant axe and then somebody practicing archery in a deadly manner and inventing snowboarding, all at the same time. It's just cool. And then there's the whole saving-the-world-from-Ultimate-Eldritch-Evil angle, which is just too much fun for words.

The science of the (im)possible test

Have a feeling I screwed up my political science exam but good. I got there a few minutes late (I always think that dumb class starts a half-hour later than it actually does! It's a good thing I decided to come "early".) Not feeling so confident just now, but it will all come out in the wash. The midterm's only worth 15%, so there will be plenty of room to fix my mark.

However, I am thrilled to report that I have also got mail again! A very nice Hallowe'en card from Grandma, a few newspaper clippings, a note, and some amusing playing cards from Mum, and more newspaper clippings along with a quintet of very excellent notes from Jeanne-Marie. I am so blessed to have people who actually bother writing to me, particularly as I am an extraordinarily unfaithful correspondent.

That said, this game is evil. It is "the thrilling web-based adventure in which a curious little monkey commits horrific crimes against humanity!" It's not graphic, except in its descriptions (and some of the monkey's crimes really are quite funny).

Wingly Goodness

West Wing is officially still my favourite show. Not that there was much concern about that, but The Daily Show is closing fast, it seems, with its heeelarious take on Zell Miller at the RNC. Anyway, The Premiere was great. I'll recap it quickly some other time.

Tidmerms

The Mom-requested midterm update: My head is spinning a bit because of the volume of history I have just spewed out. It was crazy, I just kept babbling on. Hopefully the "babbling" passes for structure, and I didn't betray my ignorance by spelling things wrong. Misspelling Russian names is excusable -- though I did add a dash of authentic Slavic flavour by insisting on spelling Peter "Piotr" and Alexander "Aleksandr". This may be incorrect, but don't tell me it's less fun than Pete and Al. History exam was not too shabby, I think, and the econ seemed to go well, too. No entertaining stories to tell about that one. Hey, it's the Dismal Science, what do you want? Time will tell about the marks for those, though I do feel relatively confident. Now only the really scary one remains: the Science of the Possible, a.k.a poli-sci.

The real excitement in my day, though, is the West Wing premiere, in just five short hours! Will President Bartlet create peace in our time? Will Josh and Donna just get married already? Will Leo relapse into alcoholism, now that John "Helicopter" Wells is in charge? The tension grows!

The Wash

Midterm season commenceth. Fortunately, midterm season also terminateth Thursday, so hopefully I will survive. The agenda for the week? Tonight: study. Tuesday: economics midterm and study. Wednesday: history midterm and studying. Also some freaking out. Thursday: weeping and terror, followed by (and possibly accompanied by) poli-sci midterm. Anyway, I think I'm in okay shape for the first two. The second one I am not sure what to expect from, so I am slightly terrified. Anyway, it'll all come out in the wash. This is my mantra nowadays.

The weekend was pretty calm, just the way my parents hoped my university weekends would be. I did some work on my Big Essay, studied for my tests, and vegged. Sunday night I went to Jacob's for a study session-slash-West Wing marathon. It ended up only being one episode, plus dinner and a movie with his parents (who are very nice and quite funny as well) but the history studying was worthwhile. It made me feel very obsessive-compulsive, though, because I realized that I need to have a date for every single occurrence. I am slightly hell-bent on memorizing said dates, and have had some minor successes remembering the dates of the Franco-Prussian War (1870-71) and the date of Archduke Franz Ferdinand's assassination in Sarajevo (June 28, 1918, which is St. Vitus' Day). Go me...?

Here's to a prospective lack of failure!

Foxy laundry!

Foxy Lady is the best song ever.

Well, I have been very lax in updating this blog. Dreadful business. I must speak with the manager about this. It's been quite busy around here, and I'm taking a short unauthorized study break to do a bit of an update. Basically, my life is boring, aside from the magic of Jimi Hendrix. I have been sitting in my room quite a lot and not doing much of anything besides the occasional bit of schoolwork (my econ assignment is almost done! Hooray!).

Had a very satisfactory "study party" today with Katie-or-Kate (not yet sure which she prefers) and Lynn. Not to tempt the wrath of the whatever from high atop the thing, but I don't think the econ midterm will be so terrible. Hopefully I will remember to think things through clearly and it'll be okay. The only one I am really afraid of is my poli-sci midterm, particularly as I'm not very sure what the content is. The prof is being very mysterious indeed. Crazy man.

The weekend at home was fun, although it is a little odd being on my own again after four days of total immersion in an insanely social atmosphere. I don't think I was alone for more than an hour. It was awesome. But now I am sitting in my tiny box of a dorm room again, and Indra's watching a movie on her computer, not that we talk much anyway. Actually, she's a dream roomie if you want a quiet one. She hardly ever speaks and we don't argue over domestic issues, e.g. "You didn't clean the Big Pointy Orange-Cutting Knife and I saw you using it!" "Nuh-uh!" I do wish she talked more, sometimes, but it's probably better this way. Nobody distracts me but me, and I do a pretty good job of that myself.

Today's lesson: Allow at least two hours for laundry, or else you will have semi-wet clothing spread over your bed in a pathetic effort to dry it out after its insufficient time in the dryer. Alas. I am not a domestic goddess after all.

The Not-so-Great War

Productivity is highly overrated. Today I have been to an economics lecture and tutorial (both of which I left more confused than I was when I entered), typed up my history notes, and typed up my public affairs notes. And hey, it's only 5:30! Just look at me go.

The Internet is a bad, bad time-waster, and e-mail is the way that its devilry invades your heart. BAD INTERNET! BAD!

Yesterday night I went rock climbing, which was fabulous fun. I may have to go again just to sort myself out on the 5.9 wall that I tried and at which I failed miserably ("I'm supposed to reach what hold?!"). I did a 5.7 easily, though. The best part was probably dangling upside down, though. You know what was in my head, don't you? Yes, you do. Oh, yes you do: I am Spider-Woman!!!

In other news, we have started World War One in history class. This is very depressing. To showcase how depressing we should find this, Professor Mayer insisted on showing us a grim video full of graveyards and grainy footage of horribly young men being shot down by people they had never met. This, of course, made me cry and people from several directions proffer tissues, which were appreciated because I have run out and am too lazy to go buy any. When I get back, I will go shopping. This will make me a better roommate, also, because I have been very bad lately in terms of eating Indra's fruit and dried mango slices. It is not my fault that they are delicious. And hey, whose idea was it to make a tres ghetto bowl for said fruit, and out of whose old cereal box was that bowl made? Oh, yeah: me, and mine. Don't tell me I'm not a good roomie.

Lovely day for an unexpected delay!

My, what an exciting day I had Wednesday. The bus drivers were conspiring against me, for some reason, with the result that it took me three hours to get to Rideau Centre for a piddly errand and back to campus, rather than the usual hour or so. Miserable. Anyhow, on the ride, I jotted down some things that made me smile or think well of the world:

- The Hellenic Community Centre, the Temple Israel, and a bible chapel all in the same block.

- The realization that a month in the city does not a city-dweller make, and the accompanying realization that even if it did, I still might not understand the public transport system.

- A quick trip through the Corza Italia, with its many delicious and/or kitschy restaurants (and one lonely Moroccan restaurant).

- An Indian woman in a full sari, three elderly Koreans, and two piratical-looking men, all on the same bus at the same time.

- The enchantingly semi-run-down brick townhouses near Preston and Elm Streets.

- Driving past some farmers' fields, causing Alberta flashbacks and feelings of superiority (our fields are bigger! And wheatier!).

- The discovery that the houses in Nepean are quite nice.

- The possible exception from the previous rule of a large, gated, villa-style house with what appeared to be a large triangular Rubens painting over the garage. Very tasteful, folks.

- Two sightings of very cute babies, one with proud grandfather in tow.

So, you see, despite the low point of the voyage (waiting, with clipboard, in front of the Cuban embassy for half an hour for the errant #5 bus) an unplanned delay can prove quite pleasant. Well, until the Cubans come in the night for my clipboard and my life.

It also led, indirectly, to what I spent this morning doing. See, if I hadn't had those dreadful things happen, I wouldn't have had to go to a make-up history class Thursday night, and I wouldn't have run into Jacob, a runner from my Public Affairs tutorial, and he wouldn't have tipped me off to the race I ran this morning. I really miss racing, and maybe next race I will actually be, you know, competitive. Today's was a short 10km (closer to 8, I heard) over some mountain bike trails and ski runs (!) in the lovely and autumnal Gatineau Park. The terrain was what they call "technical". This means, in essence, lots of things trying to scratch you and to twist your ankle, which is what happened to Jacob. Finished anyway, though. Crazy man! It was quite the fun (as they say), and the fall colours are coming in really well, making a pleasant setting for extremities of pain.

The Aliens

Well, now. My essay on Western alienation is not going to make much sense, because Western alienation doesn't make much sense. Really, so much of political division is based on "we are different from Group X now because we were different then". I mean, if you don't have an industrial base and have been stifled by years of East-friendly policies, then you will continue to be so long after the policies change. Arguably, the policies haven't changed that much, but if these are all historical grievances that continue to take the Nutella-smeared bread from Prairie children's mouths? Eventually you're just shooting at dead men. And flogging their horses, too. I have to go do more reading now.

Photo Phun!

One of the murals in the tunnels... It's funnier if you watch Buffy.

Well, it's a beautiful day in the neighbourhood, and it's Health Day for Jessica. So far I've had a doctor's appointment, I've been to the pharmacy, and I've gone to see the counsellor. It's good stuff. I'm really tired (I have a feeling this will be a common refrain on this site, seeing as it's about My University Experience).

Actually, I'm really too tired to say anything constructive or at all entertaining. So away I go. Hopefully I will be in some condition to divert you all again soon, O loyal readership. Farewell!

Mail call

Snail mail is ever so much better than e-mail. There's something very satisfying about ripping open a letter. And I have had letters from so many people! From my Albertan family, from Grandma, from Auntie Moyra, from the political campaign I did a bit of work for, from various MLAs on my participation in the Summer Games ("Please know that your skill, commitment, and sportsmanship..."). It's delightful. I'm pathetically glad to have mail, actually. Sometimes it feels a bit lonely here. I said a few days ago that I felt a bit lonely and that people here don't seem as interesting as they do back home. It's probably just due to the independent style of living -- if you live sort of on your own, you're going to be on your own more -- and the fact that I haven't really had a chance to make a family yet. Everyone's getting along pretty well, though. I am cordially invited to go out to a strip club in Hull Friday night, but have serious doubts that I will go, because:

1. I am underage, even in Quebec, which wouldn't be a problem if not for

2. I don't have a fake ID, nor do I have faith in my ability to dress like somebody who's reached the age of majority. And besides,

3. It's a strip club. For heaven's sake, people, I have 60 pages of Plato to read by Monday. Fun is for people who don't know the joys of Greek dialogue.

It is rather tempting to simply go off the deep end and pick up various substance abuse habits, but I am discovering that I have quite puritanical instincts, applied to myself if not to others. I am very, very frightened of doing anything stupid. I know that one has to let loose every so often, and while there seem to be about 19 500 serious partiers and 500 serious students in the undergrad corps (or, on Sunday mornings, corpse), I am sure that not everyone needs to validate their existence by getting absolutely blasted each weekend. This is, after all, a very serious undertaking and I have prohibitive amounts of reading to do. Trust that I will give ample notice if I decide to abandon all the morals I am developing. Well, perhaps not ample, but you will at least know what's going on if you start getting e-mails full of gross misspellings ("High, guyes! How r ewe doing?!11!!? im havin liek, the most funn EVER!").

Ethnic update: There is another Armenian descendant on my floor! Her name is Sara, and her surname ends in "jian", so I asked her whether that meant what I thought it did. She was very excited that I actually know Armenia exists. She says most people don't -- for shame!

But I must go read chapter ten of Whittington and Williams' scintillating work, Canadian Politics in the 21st Century. I hope everyone's doing well and taking care of themselves.

Nemo saltat sobrius

Sunday evening and Monday afternoon I got two batches of terrible news from home. They added up to this: Two of my friends are dead.

There are no pretty words. They have not passed on, the final curtain has not gone down, they have not shuffled anything off, they are just dead. And they shouldn't be. I know how it looks. Four teenagers in a car, coming home from a last camping trip Labour Day weekend, swerve into an oncoming van. But they weren't drunk. Two girls and a boy died, one girl got out with only bruises, physically. They weren't doing anything wrong... I don't think they ever did anything wrong. I want to explain these people to whoever's reading, as I knew them.

There was Amanda, who I didn't know.

There was Stephanie, who I knew from when we were both in grade five, proud and nervous to be starting Honour Choir. She has a cheerful face and a sweet smile. Her website entries are all extraordinary; she liked to post photos of herself, her friends, and other subjects, all full of charm and vivacity, always accompanied by captions that may have been spur-of-the-moment but were always perfect. She listened to Josh Groban and Switchfoot and was going to Capernwray Bible School in England -- she started a countdown (on her website, naturally) to when she would leave. Steph was the one I never paid as much attention as her merits warranted. It's absolutely useless to say it, but I wish we'd been closer.

There was Luke, who is so difficult to talk about. Luke was full of sunshine. I only met him in October, at a surprise birthday party for the fourth girl, the one who got out alive, but meeting the famous Luke was a highlight of the evening. We played a board game called Cranium, and we both got very excited over the word puzzles. He was very smart, a National Scholar in biology, but Becca and I agreed today that he never used his intelligence to make anybody else feel stupid. In eleven months of knowing him, I got to feel like we'd been friends forever. It always made him so worried when any of his friends fought. We were always happy when Luke was around. He understood what was important -- not petty grievances, not small grudges, just the simple divine fact of being friends. We were all looking foward to being his friends for the rest of our lives.

And now we'll never see them again, not in this life. And how can we continue? James Boswell wrote that nemo saltat sobrius, "sober men don't dance". In a frightening, uncaring, and insecure world, we cannot do anything but fight for every bit of happiness we can find. Last night the campus pub was doing an 80s night, all-ages, playing all kinds of good old bad songs. Everyone was dancing around madly, reminding me of all the times we put on good old bad songs in Laura's basement and did the same. I did Luke's trademark Elbow Dance at the edge of a crowd of strangers. I ignored any funny looks I got, because anyone who can't deal with the Elbow Dance doesn't deserve to know even a secondhand version of the person who invented it. If they taught me anything, it was that we have to squeeze all the joy we can from our existence, whether it's in year-long countdowns to a departure, or in tablecloth sledding, or delinquent pebble messages on driveways, or in the Elbow Dance.

So last night, I went out and danced for them. Luke and Steph would want me to be happy, so I tried.

Waiting

I am in my dorm room! It's very exciting. At present I have the place to myself, as my roomie has gone off to see Niagara Falls (the happy consequence of this is that I can listen to Marvin Gaye at ten a.m. without worrying about bothering anybody). Her name is Indra and she's from Mongolia, but has spent three years going to school in Brussels. Mum is getting nervous about not knowing anything about Mongolia. The only thing I know about Mongolia is that they have the Gobi Desert and throat-singing, which sounds quite different from Inuit throat-singing. It's very cool, but I don't think I'd like to listen to it all the time. I didn't get at all what I wanted in my residence room, but I don't mind much. I asked for a single room and got a double, asked for a co-ed floor and got an all-girls floor with lots of international students (which will probably be really cool), asked for my friend Jessica Yates as a roomie and got Indra from Mongolia. But it's going to be fun anyway. And besides, if I'd gotten Jessica I would have to consider her musical taste and not play Motown early-ish in the morning. Mum and Dad and Elise left about an hour ago to drive back home. I'm very, very, very glad I don't have to do that drive again. It wasn't bad the first time, but the return trip they'll just be seeing the same landscapes in reverse. So, if they're reading this on the road, best of luck to them! A while ago I had a scary moment, and an introduction to the university modus operandi. Our rez fellow, Maria, (the rez fellow is the social organizer and den mother for the floor of your residence building) told us we'd all be going to breakfast together about eight-thirty. I woke up about seven-fifteen to see the family off and get myself put together for the day, only to discover that by eight-forty there was no sign of life from all of the rooms except about three. I thought everyone had left without me, but upon arrival at the cafeteria I discovered that it seemed to be closed. On my disheartened way back to my dorm, I met with Maria, who said that nobody was up yet. I see. So I haven't been abandoned, I'm just a freakishly early riser for residence. To do: Get my long distance coverage (at present I can receive but not make long distance calls), finish buying my textbooks, do some fun stuff for Orientation week, buy a couple of baskets or bins for the room, and make friends.

Home away from home

Move-in day for residence is tomorrow! Very exciting stuff, indeed. I still don't know who my roomie is going to be, but there is a girl I know who is going to the same school and living in res. We requested each other as roomies, but we don't know whether we'll actually get each other. Our trip to Ontario has been lots of fun. More on that later-- I'm on something of an expensive Internet connection right now, but I'm planning on putting up a good long post once I get set up.

Wired but unprintable

Hooray! My laptop has arrived. The printer has yet to appear, but Purolator should have it to us... later. Hopefully it will have materialized by the time we leave on Wednesday. If not, I shall be most vexed. I am already feeling rather silly: I have spent some time over the past few days searching frantically for my box of fresh contact lenses. Dad developed a suspicion, which I followed through on by calling the opthalmologist's. Sure enough, it turns out that we hadn't picked the lenses up at all! And now I feel extremely dumb. Two sleeps til we leave!

Fizzing

Wednesday I arrived home from a very excellent camping/hiking trip with two of my friends (Katie and Keith, incidentally an adorable couple). I only slid ignobly down the mountain once, flared the camping stove only once, and only one bear tried to eat us. All in all, a successful adventure. I'm getting very, very excited: five days until departure time! I could hardly sleep last night. If this continues I'm going to do a very poor job indeed of packing. It's a challenge to choose which books to take, because I must consider not only which ones I need to bring, but which ones the Fambly can do without. Also, I am not sure about storage space and may wind up sending all manner of junk home with them (and they don't need it, because Casa McClay has more than enough junk as it is -- charming and occasionally useful junk, but junk nonetheless). The laptop Dad and I ordered has still not arrived, imperiling the continuation of this blog. They did say 8-10 business days, but I think it's been nearly that by now. Oh, dear...

Inauguration Day

Hello, out there! It's the semi-exciting debut of my brand new blog, created for my brand new university life. Please wish it luck as it stumbles, blinking, out into cyberspace. I've started it as a sort of newsletter so that anyone who knows the address can come check on my adventures in our nation's capital, and also as a record of said adventures. Currently, the adventures have only extended as far as thinking about which sheets and towels to bring with me to residence, and worrying about whether my course registration and residence package are going to work out alright. I am leaving in less than a month and am beginning to feel a bit frantic, because I tend to procrastinate in order to avoid doing things that frighten me at all. But it will all turn out fine, I'm sure. And so, adieu. New features including comment boxes to allow for feedback will be forthcoming, assuming I have the time and the inclination to put them in. I hope this is the beginning of something good.